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Every night you come to me
I see your shining face
I kiss your perfect lips
I hold your hands in mine
And every morning
I open my eyes
And you are gone


Oh and I only have 11 assignments left in school until I get my associates degree in medical assistance. I’m so excited

Never have I been so alone in my entire life.

Love is a losing game.

So my therapist asked me what would I say or do to the person that I’ve experienced the most hurt with if I saw them coming towards me.
I couldn’t give her an answer, and I still don’t know.
I don’t think I would smile.
I certainly wouldn’t be happy.
I don’t think I would be mad.
I think I would be devastated but probably just smile and act like seeing that person doesn’t destroy me inside.
I really just don’t know. Pretending that you don’t exist is so much easier than pretending that I might see you again someday.

Since I’ve started my antidepressant I have no appetite.
Since I’ve started my stomach medication, food makes me feel sick.
Even the thought of eating makes me feel sick.
Day 4 of no food…

"My only relief is to sleep. When I’m sleeping, I’m not sad, I’m not angry, I’m not lonely, I’m nothing."
-Jillian Medoff  (via pestan)


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